Dead, Weak

So I have been feeling numb all week. We are smack dab in the middle of Dead Week, the week at Georgia Tech right before finals. Teachers allegedly do not give out any tests, quizzes, or new material this week, and it is supposed to be a time that we breathe before we get slaughtered by our finals.

And I have no motivation to study.

I have been goofing pretty much all week, leaving my work to the last minute. I do not have many finals, and I am secure in most of my classes, which leads me to my indifference. I have had a pretty rough semester, doing a lot of soul searching, etc, so I really want to just stop. I do not feel like I can press on for the final stretch. I feel like the kid in the marathon who collapsed at the cooler three feet away from the finish line. It's all in the head, but the mind is a powerful tool.

I type this with my Bible sitting next to me, and I want to open it, but sometimes I feel like I open my Bible and read from it just because I can fulfill my Christianly duties. I wish this was not the case, but I truly am struggling.

But it is a good type of struggle. I feel like I have seen God this semester more than any of the previous ones. I have felt Him take over areas of my life that I have struggled in, areas that I only reluctantly surrendered to Him. I have felt His love more than ever. But the thing is, I don't want to live based on feelings. I truly want to seek His face. And if by seeking His face I have to face the fact that I am completely incapable of finishing this semester without him, then I know that everything that I am feeling right now is just another realization of the grace by which I have true life. As church-y as that sounds, I mean it. I cannot do this by myself.

Dear Reader, whoever you are, please remember the cross. Please remember the life that we have in Jesus. Life is futile, life is worthless....life is nothing without Jesus. You have to believe me.

*Give me Jesus, give me Jesus, you can have all this world, but give me Jesus.*

random thoughts on a friday morning when i should be studying or asleep

--Free t-shirts rock my world.

--I am going to try and only wear free t-shirts for the rest of the semester.

--I got 4 free tshirts in one week. SCORE!

--Why do my eyeballs throb when its this late at night?

--Why does Sprite turn green in your stomach after you drink it?

--Why did I have to vomit today to find this out?

--I hate the fact that I get motion sickness.

--I'm in denial about the fact that I get motion sickness.

--I don't get motion sickness.

--I don't like to eat mushy things. They make me gag.

--Will the fact that I hate mushy food become a problem in Uganda?

--I wish I was a natural at Physics.

--I wish I wasn't afraid of heights.

--I'm too dark for henna tattoos.

--I like to be right more than I should.

--I wish business would win over pleasure more often.

--I don't like texting that much, only to a select few. It takes too much work, and my fingers get tired.

--Don't take it personally when I don't text back. I'm just lazy and I feel that it is too much effort to respond.

--I like it--nay, I love it-- when people call me.

--Facebook. Oh Facebook.

--No, seriously. My eyes are throbbing.

--I am pretty darn selfish.

--It was weird seeing you today. Like that. It was hard, but humbling.

--I miss you, my friend. Why did you do that to your family? I am praying for you, my love. My sister.


And now it is time to sign off.

oh snap

I keep hearing about the massive religious movement that is being spearheaded by Oprah and another one of her man-slaves, a new guy by the name of Eckhart Tolle (what happened to her gopher Dr. Phil?), but I didn't want to believe it. Not that I like Oprah or anything, it just sucks because she does hold so much influence over so many women these days. Well see for yourself, and make your own opinion.

But always remember 1 John 4:1-5.


Yes, I am having a lots of fun with hyperlinks.

SBNAL: Start the Revolution

SBNAL = "Smiling But Not Actually Laughing".

This new acronym is the savior to the ailing overusage of the phrase that we all know as LOL, or "laughing out loud" for those who have been under a rock for the past 8 years. The aforementioned phrase is one that has become so popular that it has crawled out of the acceptable arena of typos that we know as Instant Messaging and has made its way into our common vernacular. This word has become a terror to clueless parents and frazzled English teachers alike, and frankly, it should be stopped.

However, I do not call for complete eradication of the acronym in question from our day-to-day speech; when used in the appropriate context it provides a universal inside joke for the millenial generation. My frustration actually does not lie in the fact that it is overused per se. I am more perplexed by the fact that when one writes--or utters-- "LOL" they more than likely ARE.NOT.LAUGHING.OUT.LOUD.

And just like that, a tiny phrase, a mere initialled word has turned our youth into a generation of LIARS. LIARS, I TELL YOU. This must be stopped. Our children are the future, the hope for tomorrow, and if something as little as a mere phrase is going to corrupt and demoralize the very fiber of what the future has to offer, then God help us, we are screwed.

Oh, the humanity.

I present to you a solution, a remedy to this acronym. SBNAL is a phrase that can be typed with just a little more effort than it takes to write "g2g", and MUCH MUCH less effort than it takes to write "ROTFL" (which is a WHOLE nother issue, because i have yet to perform the described action after reading a humorous comment during an IM chat). More than anything, SBNAL allows the conversationist the freedom of using a few facial muscles to express their amusement instead of buckling under the social pressure of mustering up the strength to generate actual laughter, even if it is for only a warm chuckle. It is effortless, it is moral, and it is true.

Please use the amendment well, for woe is the day that it falls into the category of the annoying or the obsolete, where timed phrases such as "Far out", "Groovy", "As If" and "Psyche" have suffered a very ill fate. I willingly give SBNAL to you. Use it wisely. Tell your friends.

Postscript:
Accolades to a Mr. Cantrell, who actually came up with the acronym.

LOL, hahaha, ROTFL, JK

Are all phrases that are overused in everyday IM speak. Please refrain from using them in my presence.

J/K.

I think the only one I don't like is LOL.....because more than likely I'm not laughing out loud. I'm just saying that to keep the conversation going. And you know what? You probably aren't LOL-ing either. So don't write it. OK I'm done.

Green is the New Black

SO this whole green phase has me really wigging out. Everywhere I look it's reduce carbon emissions this or turn your light off that or make sure you don't throw away that recycle you insensitive freak or don't eat that, baby turtles in the Island of Yap are going to grow an extra toe. It's madness, I tell you. Now, let me clarify, I'm not upset at the cause at all. I actually consider myself to be a conservationist, and I think I will always be. After all, God calls us to be stewards of this beautiful Earth that He has blessed us with. I believe there are certain measures that should be taken in order to maintain this planet we call home.

But I loved the Earth before the hype.

So yes, I'm a little bitter. It bothers me that people are beginning to conserve as a massive effort. I am ecstatic that it is so popular, but I'm kind of worried about when the craze dies down. I mean seriously, the Earth is something that we have to always conserve. You can't just let it go out of fashion....it's pretty much a lifestyle. When people realize that, for the rest of their lives, they are going to have to bring their own bag to the grocery store, or save all of their used office paper/newspaper, or never buy bottled water again, or pump their tire gauges regularly, or keep the thermostat high in the summer and low in the winter.....will they?

They won't.
And that's the REAL Inconvenient Truth.

I do believe that it is a valiant effort by corporations to push conservation, but using a vague motivation such as "global warming" is not going to keep people inspired forever. Once someone says that the Globe don't warm no more, people are going to run out and buy the biggest Hummer they can find. OK that was really pessimistic. Don't worry human race, I still love you. I'm just saying, guys, isn't it a lot easier to hop on the band wagon of mass hysteria than to actually sit down and realize how serious a problem this is? Wouldn't it be better if you do your own research to find out what you can do to take care of our Earth instead of letting every massive media machine feed shallow solutions to you? Behavior modification does not = lifestyle change. Let's get serious about this stuff. If you want to really rock the boat with conservation, just do it. Don't brag about how many trees you saved with one stack of newspaper (btw, a 3-foot stack saves one tree). Instead, just do it. People may not notice it, but hey, that's the price of doing something right.

*Removes soap box from underneath herself and says*

I'll try to keep the rant-y posts to a minimum....I just had to get that off of my chest. I'm good now.



*Don't it always seem to go,
that you don't know what you've got till
it's gone
They paved paradise to put up a parking lot.*
~Joni Mitchell

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